Edit: I don’t mean someone that will sacrifice their life for yours, more someone who would go out of their way to rush you to the hospital or something
I think the number is a lot higher and the barrier of trust a lot lower than people think.
If you come across a vehicle accident and you are able to help someone generally people don’t even think and just take action to save another persons life.
In reactionary scenarios where direct intervention saves someone’s life, people help a lot more than you’d think.
As a species we generally have a bypass in our brains that makes us want to help others in desperate need.
The answer is contextual, just like people are contextual. Sometimes, my circles are all busy or stressed out and we can’t really be there for each other. Other times, strangers have saved me, like the couple that took me in when lockdowns started and I was far from home.
Have you heard of the Stanford Prison Experiment? Or the Princeton Seminarian experiment? Or the Milgram Experiment? All of them confirm that people are contextual. That’s lesson 1 in psychology, but we humans easily forget it. We focus on the person and forget the context. That folly of ours even has a name: Fundamental Attribution Error.
Fwiw Stanford was basically a scam. The story as it’s usually told is a lie, and its results are in serious contention, even beyond the usual replication issues psychology studies have.
Milgram is a good study, and even seems to have survived multiple replication attenpts, but its results are often overstated in their broader applicability. Notably: there are issues around the idea that it is “authority” that causes people to comply, as is usually claimed, instead of a belief in “expertise” or trust in the system (e.g. that a university-authorised study is obviously not going to kill people). Still, the conclusions are good enough for the purposes of your comment here.
I know way more people who would at least attempt to save my life in an emergency than I think are genuinely good people. But I do actually think that’s part of identifying a decent person. Empathizing with someone suffering in front of you and wanting to help is such a low standard for empathy that even untrained animals sometimes pass this bar. Empathizing with living things more broadly and outside of your personal bubble is a task that’s apparently too much to ask of most people I’ve met. Good way to gauge this is to get someone talking for a bit about the unhoused population of their hometown.
I think animals are much more capable of empathy than the average person
Until recently I would have said 0%, but probably 95% of my current friends would rush me to a hospital (if it was physically possible) the other 5% are perpetually busy and would probably find someone who could.
Why the drastic change?
I found a group of people who actually give a fuck about each other. I am never letting them go. They are stuck with me now.
I think most of my friends and even acquaintances would rush me to a hospital.
I think more than 50% of the people I know would do that.Regarding genuinely good and trusting my life, that would would be smaller.
A question on the other view tho:
Would you(not OP only) be that genuinely good person for someone? As a guess, in your view how many people would see you like that?I think only my family and maybe close friends would see me like that.
Regarding getting people to a hospital, I think the 50% stuff would apply to me too.
I unfortunately would help out 99% of people
Zero. Become partially disabled for over a decade and you might understand. Sometimes surviving is worse than dying. You might become a different person you might not, but you will likely discover how everyone in your life is largely there in relative orbits. If you get knocked out of the stellar system, what you thought of as the planets that grounded your social world will not leave the star to chase after you no matter how much you need them to.
Having been through a bad health situation, I understand what you mean. Not even my own parents supported me.
That’s terrible.
They are the only ones that are supposed to help you.
Also the people you consider real friends can let you down.
In my experience it’s sometimes the ones you don’t expect that are there for you.
You didn’t ask their help and are just close enough to vent your problems.
Those are the good people and that gives me a sparkle of hope for the otherwise very grim world.That has been my experience too. The not expected actually there for you friend. There are friends we feel close to and friends who would drop everything to come lend aid. There may be some overlap between those two groups, but don’t mistake the former for the latter.
Few and far in between
Absolutely. I’m not disabled but I can say with confidence there are genuinely zero good people on this planet. Me included. People are truly only in it for themselves and will cast aside and trample anyone who gets in their way.
Learned that first from my parents. Even if they’re related to you, they will throw you under the bus at their earliest convenience.
I know several people who would give up anything on hand to help if needed. There are plenty of good people in this world. If you’re willing to give, you will find those willing to help
But there’s no guarantee that if the time came where someone was in need, they would actually act and give up things on hand.
I grew up thinking that friends and loved ones took care of each other when in need. I even dropped big things to help those I loved. My mom neglected her health until she needed an emergency surgery and once I found out I dropped a final exam in uni to make sure she got there and took her meds.
When I had a serious emergency though, I was completely alone. Both parents, all family and friends. You have friends until they decide you don’t offer them enough. It’s too much energy expended to maintain dynamics like that with multiple people. You end up feeling worthless and that takes a big toll on your health.
Some people suck. But no, that’s not the case for many of the people I know. I know many people who aren’t transactional at all. I have friends who don’t care about value and will help whenever is needed. I know other people who are like what you’re talking about. But still, the good ones, that will help for whatever, are genuinely good. They’re not doing it as a transaction.
I didn’t expect an astrophysics analogy when I opened this post but good one
Having lived here for over half a century now, and having met a ton of people and having get to know a solid portion of them better, I could safely say:
My wife and myself. The rest I would not bet a TicTac on. Homo homini lupus est. People are nice to you, even seem like “good people”, but, as another comment or already said, people are contextual.
Be a tiny bit different from the mass and you’d notice why. People are nice to you as long as you provide some kind of benefit to them. Now or in the future. Even worse if you have money and they know it.
Yet, Despite me being misanthropic as hell, I still do care about my fellow species-members (everything living actually) and do voluntary work for disabled people and stuff like that. And yes, I know that most of them would probably sell me to one of Dante’s circles of hell to get rid of their disability. But there are always some pearls somewhere in the ocean. It’s worth finding them. Tiresome and frustrating, but worth it.
This is a realistic mindset
People being nice to you only if you provide a benefit to them is certainly not something I’ve experienced in general. Sounds like this person knows lots of assholes.
It does not always have to be obvious to you as to what their benefit in you actually is. Doesn’t mean they won’t see one in you. Sometimes it’s very abstract not clearly superficial. You will notice if you somehow loose that benefit. And yes, met many assholes. Almost exclusively. Hence the point. But I’m very picky with people.
I’ve also almost met exclusively assholes, it happens
I’d trade it for a more oblivious anytime 😁
There is a big difference between a good person that will not intentionally do you harm and is happy to help vs one that would enter risk to save you in life or death.
I know lots of people I am confident would do me no harm and treat me well. I know a few that do not care / can’t be trusted.
As for my life that is fairly limited to select family and a few friends.
Im 58, I’ve et 4 people in my life I’d classify as “good”. Im with one and I’m not one.
All 4 are women, which gives me pause as a guy.
The grass is always greener on the other side.
I would say the vast majority of people are good, however people are flawed so a lot of people are bad at being good.
This is pretty close to my answer. I feel bad for the people who don’t think their friends would drive them to the hospital if they were dying.
That type of betrayal is actually so common that there is a term for it, look up “cancer ghosting”. A lot of people wouldn’t believe in it until it happens to them.
“Good” or “trust my life with”? The two can be mutually exclusive. If I was in the wrong, would a good person defend me?
I’ve met a few people with genuinely good morals in my life. They do exist and are almost incorruptible. Most people are flexible in that we can make justifications for almost anything.
Having actually been rushed to hospital when I was a kid by my friends after a big accident on my bike I would say the number is higher than you might think. They even walked by bike back home, which considering it was miles from home was pretty mad for teenagers.
I would say at least 20 people I know who are close to me either have done something I would consider above and beyond for me already or I know for sure would do so. Thats not counting any relatives.
There are a lot of people who would rush me to the hospital but also voted to take away my rights and worse. I don’t know if I believe in good people these days.
Those are 2 different questions with 2 different answers.
First one, maybe 25%.
Second one, maybe 2%.
I don’t really consider rushing someone to a hospital as an especially high bar for genuinely good person. Seems more like the bar for not being a genuinely bad person. Not sure if that means that I’m positive or negative about humanity.
