Lol it’s almost even more extreme and has a common trope I love. “Hey I got this spam text…”
“Burn all your devices. Remove yourself from the grid. Scrub your identity. Purchase a single burner phone. Root it and install Graphene. Yes it’s hard. Google it. Wait, don’t google it. Search for it elsewhere. Amass money somehow without using technology. Cut off your family ties. You need to move to another country. You will need a work visa to move to most countries. But to get that you will need an accepted job in advance. And to have that you will probably need to access technology. Instead, buy a fake passport, because very few countries will just let you ‘move somewhere’ with a ‘menial job.’ Once you get there, develop passive income streams and quit your job. After you have been a landlord for two years you will finally know what it’s like to claim that being a landlord is a real job because you need to talk to tenants and file paperwork natively for an hour or two a week.”
I lost it at “root it and install Graphene.” GrapheneOS does not work with rooted devices, and rooting is considered a security risk by the Graphene dev team haha.
Spy: you have a dinner date for 7. What time do you arrive?
Scout: 7… AM. Case the restaurant, run background checks on the staff. Can the cook be trusted? If not I’ve gotta kill him. Dispose of the body, replace him with my own guy no later than 4:30.
Lol it’s almost even more extreme and has a common trope I love. “Hey I got this spam text…”
“Burn all your devices. Remove yourself from the grid. Scrub your identity. Purchase a single burner phone. Root it and install Graphene. Yes it’s hard. Google it. Wait, don’t google it. Search for it elsewhere. Amass money somehow without using technology. Cut off your family ties. You need to move to another country. You will need a work visa to move to most countries. But to get that you will need an accepted job in advance. And to have that you will probably need to access technology. Instead, buy a fake passport, because very few countries will just let you ‘move somewhere’ with a ‘menial job.’ Once you get there, develop passive income streams and quit your job. After you have been a landlord for two years you will finally know what it’s like to claim that being a landlord is a real job because you need to talk to tenants and file paperwork natively for an hour or two a week.”
I lost it at “root it and install Graphene.” GrapheneOS does not work with rooted devices, and rooting is considered a security risk by the Graphene dev team haha.
Or when Scout explains his date plan to Spy.
Spy: you have a dinner date for 7. What time do you arrive? Scout: 7… AM. Case the restaurant, run background checks on the staff. Can the cook be trusted? If not I’ve gotta kill him. Dispose of the body, replace him with my own guy no later than 4:30.