I have a few.

Camera shuttering sounds. I don’t need to hear your camera, dude. Yeah I know most porn is produced and exploited but, don’t need to hit it home doing this. Here is what I don’t get, why not use inexpensive drone cameras to take footage or take shots? Who the fuck needs stupid people doing it?

Cameramen muffled or hearing. I don’t need to hear you either. I don’t give a fuck if you’re enjoying it, just shut the hell up.

Sped-up previews or even sped-up videos because reasons? It just takes me out of the immersion, if there were any to be had.

Exaggerated sounds and moans. “UNNHHH!” “AHHH!!” “HNNN!” “OOOOOO!” slrshrlshlp splsplslspl moist sounds Just fucking mute it. Don’t watch porn for audio.

Seeing that guy in a scene. You know, that awkward fucking guy who is part of the scene who just idly stands there just jerking off all like “nhhn yeah hrrr yeah oh so into this” I want a series of porn videos, where it is just beating that guy down.

  • Frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    10·
    4 days ago

    There’s one particular video I’ve always had in mind. It’s with a Czech actress who variously went by Nella, Jackie, or Jana. She mostly did lesbian and solo porn (and was big in the early days of Sapphic Erotica), but there is one MF video she did.

    There was a guy behind the camera with a cigar who would not shut the fuck up through the whole scene. The guy she was actually fucking for the scene seemed fine, but the camera/director/producer/whatever needed to leave. There’s a point where she looks like she’s about to come while also wanting to punch the guy in the neck. You can’t help but think that this scene was why she only did scenes solo or with other women from then on.