Hitchin’ up the buggy,
Churnin’ lots of butter,
Raised a barn on Monday,
Soon I’ll raise another!
Think you’re really righteous?
Think you’re pure of heart?
Well I know I’m a million times as humble as thou art!

I’m the pious’t guy the little amish wanna be,
Like on my knees day and night,
Scorin’ points for the afterlife!

So don’t be vain! And don’t be whiney!
Or else I might have to get medieval on your hiney!