Is this a normal thing, to want to share your day with someone regularly? I’ve never felt the urge to do this, even on notable days. Wondering if anyone can explain their reasoning.
Asking someone about their day just a way to check in with your partner or spouse or friend. It can be an invitation to vent about work, show interest in a project they’re working on, or offer them some adult conversation if they have been with children all day.
Recounting every detail isn’t necessary. I try to stick to funny or notable moments. It’s more a desire for connection than a desire for a precise accounting and i’m glad to skip it if there’s something more interesting to talk about.
It’s normal to want to share things you found interesting or noteworthy with others and to want feedback in the forms of praise, comfort, advice, reassurance, or even to just have something to talk about during your time apart. I don’t need to know every little mundane detail, but I’m curious about the lives of people I’m close to :)
The day specifically, or anything about what you’re doing and what’s happening to you? Venting and talking about yourself are near-universal psychological needs, from what I can tell.
Not having to worry about them could actually be really handy, I guess, if that’s you.
I generally meant just having the desire to talk with someone regularly even for no practical reason. Most times ppl ask how I’m doing or how my day was, it’s one word answers because I don’t feel the need to share, and usually there’s not much going on. I don’t really get how ppl, even married couples, have so much to talk about.
My wife calls me and tells me everything about her day the moment she steps out of her HELLISH AND UNBEARABLE (but still air-conditioned) desk job, and then again when we’re home. 😅
Surprisingly (perhaps not?), I’m more of an all-purpose yapper and, when we’re done with our post-work rituals, will start talking about Plato, Jesus and geopolitics in long-form TED talks…
I think it’s more about who you are sharing it with rather than that you are sharing it.
If I were single, I wouldn’t be calling up a friend or relative to tell them about my day, but it’s nice to share with the wife when the day was particularly difficult/good/fun/etc
Only if something actually interesting happened. Interesting enough for me to still care about it once I walk out the office door. I think it irritates my wife that I don’t have more to tell her about my workday. But for me, I pretty much just mentally flip a switch when work is done, and don’t give a shit about it until 9am the next work day. I say this as someone who generally likes their job. I’m also lucky to work somewhere with no drama.
On the other hand, I have a coworker who has several 20+ minute phone calls with his wife throughout the day, where they tell each other literally every fucking thing that has happened to them since the last call. I cannot wrap my head around that level of co-dependency.
But for me, I pretty much just mentally flip a switch when work is done, and don’t give a shit about it until 9am the next work day.
Same. This is the behavior I expected from most people, however many seem to be closer to your coworker, which I also cannot wrap my head around.
Not unless there was something funny or truly interesting, otherwise it is a grunted “eh, same ol’”.
This would def be me if in a relationship. I’m gonna have to be on the lookout for a lady that doesn’t mind the stoic quiet type, haha
i believe that neurotypicals often naturally want to share their day with one another. as for me, i had to make a concerted effort to make it a habit. i felt that regularly telling my partner about my day and hearing about hers would be a good routine for keeping informed and bonding.
Yes, it’s very common. There are many reasons.
Sometimes I’m just excited to share something. Could be something trivial (“i saw a cat on the walk over and it looked right at me and said ‘meow’!”). Could be something bigger (“They finally fired Useless Bob at work”)
Sometimes people want to vent. Talking about something can be emotionally soothing.
Sometimes people want help or advice. “I can’t believe I’m spending $20 a day on lunch. The stupid sandwich I got wasn’t even good. What’s your strategy?”
Humans are social creatures.
Humans are social creatures.
Agreed. As I age I’m starting to realize most humans seem to enjoy socializing much more than I do.
As someone who is not in a relationship, i absolutely wish i had someone to share all the random things in my life with without too much judgment. For me, i feel/think i am very lonely at times. Freely sharing things with somebody and them freely sharing with me would make me feel like i belong at least somewhere in this world for at least a little bit. So i guess it’s about a sense of belonging for me
Interesting. I feel almost the opposite. I am also not in a relationship, but almost never feel lonely and have no desire to share most things with anyone. Having little experience I can’t say for sure, but it almost would seem like a chore to me to have those conversations. Probably explains why I’m usually single, haha
I don’t really feel the urge either, but I use my day as a topic of conversation with my wife. Just talking with her is the goal.
Language is an important part of how most humans bond. The amount and content of the language varies from person to person, as do their preferences for various aspects of communication. There are very few humans who can feel close to another person with no communication (and language is our most easily-identifiable and possibly our most important method of communication. Notably, even groups of humans previously thought to communicate very little–like nonverbal autistic people, for instance–communicate a significant amount, even when it is nonverbal. But most humans communicate verbally in addition to other ways.
I’m saying it’s normal and a happy thing that people tell each other about their day.
If there was something genuinely interesting I would want to share it yes. I can’t stand idle chit-chat though, and do everything I can to avoid it.
Note: I am single. I wonder why?
I can’t stand idle chit-chat though, and do everything I can to avoid it.
Note: I am single. I wonder why?
Same here, lol
Anything really. You’ve spent so much time with your SO that you’ve basically told them everything about yourself and vice-versa. But you still want to talk to them and tell them things. So, you start bringing up new stuff. Dreams, office gossip, that jerk in traffic, whatever happens.
I can see this I suppose. I’ve never been one to enjoy talking or conversing in general, so I guess I’m more disposed to silence.
I always related with the talking heads lyric “say something once, why say it again?” Lol
You’re ok, OP! It’s normal to want to share and also normal to not want to share! Everyone is different! Some people are more “stoic”, introverted, quiet, etc. and there’s nothing wrong with that or you!
I think you should talk to your partner about how they feel about the fact that you don’t share much. Because we are all different, they may want you to open up a bit more or they may be indifferent towards it. Relationships are going to be a bit of a compromise.
But again, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being that way. :)
Edit: A lot of people have boring as fuck days too without much to share lol. If something interesting or funny happened during your day, your SO might appreciate a share!
I’m currently single and have been for most of my life, and I think this may be one reason why - I don’t have as strong of a desire for that kind communication so I’m more ok being alone than seemingly the average person.
I’m not worried about this as like you stated, people are all very different and there’s someone for everyone. I just find it interesting to hear the logic behind people’s social behavior that I don’t identify with.
Absolutely. We spend the entire work day apart from each other. Between sleeping and going to work, the amount of time you actually spend with your partner is minuscule. So it feels necessary to “catch up” with them.
