I was describing my insane in-laws for the record.

  • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.worldOP
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    22 hours ago

    I do believe I was discussing how my extremely well off FIL loaned my BIL money to go back to school, when he had never given him a dime for anything education or otherwise ever in his life, simply so he didn’t have to take on student loans a second time, and when he was not yet employed a month after finishing school took him to court to get all of the money back. Um, this is your kid, you are worth millions easy, you didn’t do shit for him, and it was like 3-4K which is a drop in the bucket for you, which you really should have just given him, and if you were going to be like this in the end you should have just been up front and said no so he didn’t have to go through this. I think I also discussed how he promised to pay for dinner the night after my wedding when my parents had stumped up for my wedding dinner (we got married in NYC), and then when the check came started adding up what everyone owed. Again, if you didn’t want to, don’t, but don’t fucking leave everyone dangling, we didn’t ask you to. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my ex so upset, not because we had to pay, but because he did that.

    There are other things too, like his mother’s habit of weaponized eccentricity where she would give you literal garbage for Christmas presenta because she liked to pretend she was very poor even though she has more money than any of her kids, but she liked to see your face drop when you opened the gift which was trash to anyone else, and just a whole whack of other things. Narcissists are wild.

    • CMonster@discuss.online
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      18 hours ago

      There are other things too, like his mother’s habit of weaponized eccentricity where she would give you literal garbage for Christmas presenta because she liked to pretend she was very poor even though she has more money than any of her kids, but she liked to see your face drop when you opened the gift which was trash to anyone else, and just a whole whack of other things. Narcissists are wild.

      My significant other’s parents gave me a used roll of duct tape one year. This actually makes so much fucking sense reading your comment.

      • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.worldOP
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        16 hours ago

        Ah, you understand. She gave my BIL a sandwich baggie of used golf tees that were all chipped and dirty, that she picked up off the public golf course near her house. She gave me HER OWN very used bathrobe that was so threadbare you could poke holes in it with your finger. She gave her ONLY grandchild an old vitamin bottle filled with dish soap and a bubble wand she found in the park or something. We would have all forfeited presents happily if she just spent a bit of money on her grandchild, but no. She also volunteered at a Catholic secondhand store, so would just take home anything that suited her fancy, and give us these cardboard boxes, unwrapped, full of used crap nobody wanted, and grandchild would get a stained old dress or a sleeping bag that smelled like smoke.

        Some people would perceive this as a poor person who means well and is trying, but she got a ton of alimony every month, had more money than any of us, and was reassured routinely that it was ok to just celebrate at dinner and just buy a present for the kid. But the whole point was to make you feel like she was insulting you by giving you garbage.

        These people cannot change and don’t want to, and it’s not worth trying.