So, I’m a pretty average-height guy—5’7”. Not tall, not short, just… there. My feet, however, did not get the memo. They are gigantic. Size 15. Which means I leave footprints that suggest someone much larger (or possibly Bigfoot) passed through, got spooked, and took off running.
People always comment. First, the double-take. Then: “Whoa. Those are… big.” And finally, the classic: “How do you even find shoes?”
Badly. That’s how.
Shoe shopping for me is like searching for an ancient artifact. Store clerks disappear into the back, only to return shaking their heads, as if I’d asked for a unicorn saddle. “We might have one pair in the back…” And what they bring out is always tragic—some orthopedic dad sneaker the size of a small canoe, usually in a shade best described as “beige disappointment.”
For a while, I tried to hide it. I slouched. I crammed my toes into size 13s like a Victorian woman chasing a terrible beauty standard. I even considered custom shoes—until I saw the price and briefly thought maybe barefoot life isn’t so bad.
But now? I’ve embraced it. I don’t tip over easily. I get extra legroom on buses just by existing. And when people ask about my shoe size, I just smile and say, “Great for swimming.”
You should start an onlyfans for your feet. Then you could buy custom shoes with the money.
You’ll grow into it
You could see your feet coming around the corner then about 10 minutes later you show up.
So EU size 47.
Geländevernichtungsbretter (ground flattening boards) or Kindersärge (childrens coffins), as we call those kinds of shoes. I had a friend with EU size 48, but at least he had the matching height.
My Vans are a 49 EU?
OMG IS THAT WHAT MY SHOES HAVE LOOKED LIKE??? HAHAHAHAA. I wear size 13-17 depending on the brand. Like Jordan’s normally went to 15-17 and overall bigger shoes smaller. Though in truth my dude don’t feel bad. It’s cool being different! It means you are extra special and not normal like most people!
You look happy, though. I can’t imagine why 😉
This man cannot be knocked over.
Donald and Goofy have been searching for him.
You sir, are a comedy genius. I couldn’t stop laughing.
okay so:
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does this make running a problem or are you actually a better runner than the average person? looks like it would be a hindrance but I’m curious
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obviously there are rumors about feet size … do you find women coming on to you more because of this?
Don’t know about running but it should definitely be an advantage for swimming. Michael Phelps, the Canadian champion swimmer, has size 14 feet.
As for women coming on to him, maybe women penguins?
1 Certainly makes it easier to drag your toes while pedaling a bicycle.
You should be pedaling with the balls of your feet. Toe drag would only be an issue in a tight turn, but you can scrape your pedal doing that if you set your pedals wrong, so your toes don’t matter much.
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Bro could hang 10 off an awning
Consider barefoot shoes! Man if those aren’t a life saver idk what is. For me shoes would squish my feet quite badly. I also haven’t worn socks in like 7 months. Just warning they will require an adaptation period. Though they benefit feet real well mimics the natural spread and movement.
Get the ring to Mordor Mr. Frodo.
Nothing wrong here. just an oversized hobbit
A couple months back there was a guy, maybe 6’ tall and had a size 4 or 5 shoe. I can’t seem to find it. Anyone halp?
Probably the same person making stuff up.
Have you ever sold feet pics? You could probably make some money!
tiger woods would pay
This looks photoshopped… I’m so sorry. I mean I know it isn’t … it just looks that way.
Don’t be sorry, it is. The exact same made up story has been going on for a while.
where you shoe shopping?
I wear size 16 shoes and never really had a problem finding shoes at places like Footlocker or Famous Footwear.
They don’t always have my size in exactly what I’m looking at, but when they don’t they’ve always had it in a similar style/brand.
